By Murray Hedgcock
Gasps of delight and a round of enthused applause in the media room
of Wolverhampton's Quality Hotel around 10.10 p.m. on Friday, July 21,
marked yet another advance in the distinguished career of the President
of The Wodehouse Society (international variety).
Elin Woodger, after some minutes wrestling (with the ineffectual aid
of colleagues) at the video recorder, had hit the right buttons and
given the kiss of life to a late-night screening of PGW TV films. It was
the perfect end to a day that had begun so long ago (or so it seemed,
when you considered the packed program), back in London Town, as in the
distant Black Country we settled to enjoy Ian Carmichael and Dennis
Price as Bertie and Jeeves, in the old b/w BBC series.
Better still were two from the Wodehouse Playhouse series, which
began with The Master himself (we really should have stood in his honour)
pecking away at his famous Royal typewriter, before John Alderton and
Pauline Collins set out on their varying portrayals of Mulliner
characters.
The cognoscenti can be a bit sniffy about this one, on the matter of
class - something that does not much concern American buffs. Here in
Britain, there is a feeling that the couple are simply not upmarket
enough - Alderton with his still evident Yorkshire vowels, and Collins,
who made her name as a maidservant-turned-music-hall-star in the
well-loved series, "Upstairs Downstairs".
No matter: Ms Collins was cast not as an upper-crust PGW gel, but
much more suitably as a second company romantic lead, and then a
bird-imitator-turned-Hollywood stenographer, so that a Saturday night in
Wolverhampton improved the couple's appeal vastly, not least as there
was a fiendishly loud disco distressingly near our bedrooms, making
sleep near-impossible.
The day had begun of course not with discos, but with the rapid-fire
instructions, information and dissertations of tour leader Norman
Murphy. He laid down the law about our forthcoming activities with his
usual amiability, quite failing to cloak the air of authoritarian menace
needed to control such a junket.
As we had already been briefed on coach etiquette - in milder but
just as convincing tones - by driver and new friend Graham Restell, even
so rowdy and irreverent a bunch as a crowd of Plum buffs was relatively
quiet as we eyed our neighbours, and wondered if we would get on
happily, or need to seek a quick seat change at the first stopover.
No worries indeed: the buzz of amiable conversation was soon rising
in intensity, only to be stilled by the announcement that the first and
somewhat improbable item on the day's program would be a chat by your
correspondent, under the title "PGW and MBH", in which I would
be so bold as to draw parallels between my life and times, and those of
The Master.
Logistics dictated it was easiest to sit in a front seat, firmly
holding the hand-microphone and working from the script while looking
straight ahead, rather than face the audience.
I had never realised how difficult this might be: I had no idea if
the travellers were also listeners, or if they had gone into Gussie
Fink-Nottle mode, leaning back with mouth agape and eyes glazed. The
first mild attempts at humour appeared to be too mild, as I strained my
ears for welcome chuckles, which proved slow in coming. But everyone was
in kindly mood, and soon murmurs suggesting they were at least
listening, began to seep through the ether. They appeared to like the
risqué bit - hearing of my early years as a bank clerk, when one of the
perks was to share the bed of the manager's nubile daughter (the
punchline being that she was away on family holiday at the time, and I
had to "mind the shop"). So there was kind applause, and then
John Fletcher moved into the chair to give the first of his readings
from Wodehouse - something of a sighter, in fact, as he began coolly:
"This is a story about an excursion tour, which is also one of
my favourites. It comes from Young Men in Spats. I had thought of
changing the names of the characters and fitting in the names of our
visitors: the heroine Angelica Briscoe, AB, would obviously be Anne
Bianchi; the grocers where our two young heroes in spats met her, Thorpe
& Widgery, T&W, obviously Tillson & Woodger, and so on. But
there were too many people on the tour, so I gave that idea up. The
story, for those who haven't already guessed it, is ‘Tried in the
Furnace’."
A comfort stop broke the sequence but not the flow, so to speak, and
John completed the story of how Pongo and Barmy's friendship emerged
strangely strengthened by their ordeal involving old school ties,
vicar's daughters, and school treats.
It went well, there was obvious relish and demand for more, and from
that point, the John Fletcher career as an audio-tape reader must surely
develop, as underlined by his later performances, on Saturday and
Sunday, in powerful masterpieces of comedy.
The journey was enlivened also at various stages by Tony Ring's
playing of the Hal Cazalet and Sylvia McNair CD - yet to be released -
of songs featuring lyrics by The Master: witty, wistful, melodic, and
always sheer delight.
Our
first visit was to one of the most significant of the Murphy-researched
sites. This was Weston Park (pictured, left), a mite puzzling at first:
the gateway signs included a reproduction of the Jaguar car symbol, and
outside the great house was a sleek line of the marque's newest models,
facing a similar string of Mercedes, BMWs and Audis. What could it mean?
What did it have to do with PGW? Simple answer: Weston Park, like most
stately homes, stages all sorts of commercial events, and this was a
dealer's "ride-and-drive day", in which district dealers for
the sporty British car could test-drive new models, while comparing
their performance with that of major rivals.
Your correspondent's efforts to negotiate a hefty discount for
Jaguars for all society members was coolly received - and it was
noticeable that not one but two Jaguar PR staff took up their position
at the dealers' dining rooms, presumably to keep this dodgy lot of
literary loonies out of the favoured spot.
But no matter: sheepdog Murphy had rounded up his flock, explained
that the grounds of Weston Park, to his mind, were the grounds of
Blandings, pointed us in various directions, and ordered us to go ahead.
Even for we who had benefited from the Murphy method in the past, it was
a refreshing reminder of the range and depth of his Wodehousean
knowledge: to the many newcomers who had never before met a Murphy in
full flow, it was overwhelming.
And it was all magic: it helped to half-close the eyes, think hard
about Blandings stories and scenes, and suddenly you would realise that
you were looking at exactly the right spot.
Most suited to your correspondent's approach to life, the universe
and everything was the spreading tree under which Galahad Threepwood
would rest, think, snooze and sometimes hold court, in his hammock.
Norman Murphy could help with that one, too: he pointed out marks where
hammock ropes had cut into the bark.
Weston is a delight - although one commercially-minded American
husband was heard to mutter that it would make an ideal golf course,
several holes around the lake making best use of both the water supply
and a water hazard with the cows and sheep left in situ, just to make it
interesting. It's a thought that golf enthusiast Plum might have
entertained, too.
A mini-expedition headed into the woods to examine the gamekeeper's
cottage which in its time concealed Lady Constance's necklace, and the
Empress of Blandings. "Please Sir, Neil Midkiff is Having
Doubts," said a teacher's pet, the sharp-eyed N. Midkiff having
questioned the provenance of the cottage: it was just too modern and too
clean.
Your correspondent became of the Midkiff school of scepticism on
being told there were no bullet holes in the ceiling (from the stray
shots loosed in the direction of Freddie Threepwood when the necklace
was providing the climax to Leave it to Psmith). An explanation
offered by John Fletcher who had been there a few years ago, was that
the house and surrounding trees had been sold, the old Swiss Cottage
with dangerous floors and suffocating with ivy had been pulled down, and
this dark red brick det. des. res. built on the site. "Sic
transit" about sums it up. But the terraces, the drive, the pond by
the kitchen garden, the pigsties, the stable yard, the Greek temple, the
lake and boathouse, all tied in perfectly satisfactorily.
Lunch in The Old Stables was a pleasant, relaxed affair: by now we
were getting to know the handful of newcomers who had joined the tour,
after being unable to attend the London events opening the week. We were
all clearly like-minded about Plum.
We took a quick look at Shifnal, the pleasing market town which
Norman believes with obvious reason to be the original of Market
Blandings - again a reminder of how close to the England of his day was
Plum in his research and his writings. But the look was not too quick
for the keen to dart into second-hand bookshops and come back loaded
with Wodehouse gems.
On to Stableford in Shropshire, where The Old House was the Wodehouse
family home from 1896 (when Plum was 15) until 1902, the year he left
the Hongkong and Shanghai Bank to tackle full-time journalism and
writing. A gaggle of appreciative dogs greeted the coach party, and we
were as much enthused by the astonishing new-built gardens, as by the
modest-sized 350-year-old house. Villages and small towns which Plum had
known in younger days, long since used as settings for his writing,
usually with minor amendments to the true names, were flashed past, or
visited, or read about from the series of maps and briefing notes handed
out regularly.
Most notable was Bridgnorth, which as Norman explains, appeared under
its own name in Mike, in 1909, and in Do Butlers Burgle Banks?,
nearly 60 years later. This was the local town for Stableford, centre
for Wodehouse family shopping, and where various local events must have
added to Plum's store of knowledge of the life and times of the regions.
And there was time for a quick look at Rudge Hall, which is its real
name, seat of the Carmody family (i.e. Hugo Carmody of The Drones), the
Big House which appears in Money for Nothing as John Carroll
eventually wins his worshipped Pat Wyvern - the saga also featuring the
unspeakable Chimp Twist and the little more appealing Soapy and Dolly
Molloy.
It was back to earth with a bump as we trekked through the more
salubrious areas of Wolverhampton for our first night's stop - which
threatened at first to be wrecked by that disco, but was saved by the
video-reorder that did in the finish work. Atta boy, Elin.