Quotations from P G Wodehouse are copyright of, and reprinted by permission of, the Trustees of the Wodehouse Estate © 2012 The P G Wodehouse Society (UK)

Airs and Graces at West Wycombe - Gold Bats versus Sherlockians at West Wycombe on Sunday 28th June 2009

Noticed by Murray Hedgcock

It might be unkind to suggest that the most graceful action of the annual Gold Bats v Sherlockians cricket match at West Wycombe was the magnificent soaring, swooping flight of a lone red kite.

But the majestic bird certainly distracted the attention of spectators and – let it be whispered – even one veteran umpire, who at times had to make a conscious effort to continue monitoring the earth-bound activities of the players.

For those unaware of the background, the red kite was almost extinct in the British Isles a few years ago, but efforts were made to revive it, by introducing it to suitable areas of Wales and England – including the Cotswolds.

We have seen several of these lovely birds on every West Wycombe visit, but this year there was just one on show, who delighted the observant by making several sweeps low over the field, and actually landing on the turf during the lunch interval.

All this poetic stuff about graceful birds is of course a subtle attempt to distract attention from the embarrassing reality of resounding defeat for the gallant Wodehouseans on June 28.

In theory, these games (they began in 2001) are meant to set, shall we say, mature Wodehouseans against … er, seasoned Sherlockians, each side embellished with two or three kids under forty.

But a subtle selectorial development has crept in, either team suddenly finding, ideally, a couple of genuine youngsters, fit, fast and eager to shine.

They are usually linked by family or other ties to regular team members which is accepted as adequate qualification, even if there may be some doubts as to their detailed knowledge either of PGW or Holmes.

The Gold Bats have been known to field a pair of bright lads, guaranteed as nephews of Chairman Hilary and consort Robert Bruce.

This year, the Sherlockians added an exotic element with a pair of brothers from Northern Ireland, whose wholehearted and athletic involvement offered an instant reminder that they do indeed play in that province (where good things have been done lately at international level).

They were certainly qualified under match rules, being the nephews of Sherlockians Chairman Jonathan McCafferty: Robert Hamill was still celebrating a brand new 2:1 in Politics at Nottingham University, brother Edward here to help, while another undergraduate in George Gross added to the academic flavour.

Each team was one short, and the match lacked a second umpire, but the Sherlockians pressed into service their new membership secretary, David Jones, who had played pretty good cricket in his native Wales, and officiated with calm authority.

The Bats’ innings was dominated by Andrew Chapman, who exudes control and style, and played charmingly for 53, allowing lunch to be taken at the comfortable score of 100 for three wickets.

This solid tally was compiled despite the best endeavours of the speedy Robert Hamill, who like other young ‘uns had to learn, quickly, the technique of bowling under the old back-foot No-ball Law – something he described tersely as “a nightmare”.

As so often happens, lunch changed the complexion of the game, and the late order faded, Gross with medium-pace offspin picking up a deadly four wickets for six runs, including that of the Bats’ most dangerous hitter, Chris Read, for a mere single.

Your umpiring correspondent was glad at not being required to give any decision relating to granddaughter Georgia, who at 13 was making her first official appearance in an adult match (having spent the season playing with Kew CC Under 15, always the only girl on either side). She justified her selection with alert fielding in the Sherlockians’ innings.

The total of 135 left the game in an interesting position, and after Chris Read generously donated an early string of boundary byes to the opposition, three Sherlockian wickets crashed within minutes.

This brought the brothers Hamill together – and they quite ruined the match as a contest, while bringing much joy to their teammates, with a marvellous partnership.

Edward crashed a splendid 76, and brother Robert a cool unbeaten 36 to carry Conan Doyle’s chaps to victory with only four wickets down.

There was talk that the match should be declared null and void as the runs were hit off so quickly that the Gold Bats were unable to use their lob bowler, as required in our special match regulations, but being good sports, we agreed it would be churlish to rob those persevering Sherlockians of one of their sparse victories.

A set of Sherlock Holmes adventure DVDs donated by Gold Bats captain Bob Miller for the best Sherlockian performance, was logically awarded jointly to the Hamill brothers.

Thought For The Day: Does any Wodehouse Society member have near – or distant – relations combining youth, cricketing skill, and availability around the end of June next? We appear to need them. Urgently.

Gold Bats 135 (Chapman 53, Bull 27: Gross 4/6, R.Hamill 2/26) lost to

The Sherlockians 4/138 (E.Hamill 76, R.Hamill 36 n.o.; Barford 2/19).